Sunday, October 12, 2014

Take it one step at a time.


Warning: This blog is pretty long, but you will enjoy it!!!

Well the time has come I am going to share my immersion experience with you all, but honestly I have no idea how to even start this. I first off will tell you though my immersion was a one of a kind experience and was very different then what the other two girls had experienced. I also want you to know I am not going to give specific details to everything that happened for my own personal reasons. So here it goes…

            An immersion here in Haiti is where we leave our home in Gros-morne for about 10 days and travel into another town and stay. The main point of our immersion experience is to first off improve our language skills and second is to fully immerse ourselves into the Haitian culture. The three off us all traveled to different areas in Haiti. I was traveling to Grann Plenn, Katie was traveling to Riveye Marcel, and Frankie was traveling to Pandi. We all started our journeys on September 15th bright and early.  For me personally I was super excited but I also had a lot of mixed emotions. I mean hello I had no idea where the heck I was going. Katie and I had to take mottos to our immersions while Frankie rode up with Barrack in his truck. Katie took off first and then Frankie. I was the last of us to leave. The man who came and picked me up was named Ottobear. He was the right hand man to Gaston who runs many organizations up in Grann Plenn. So I hoped on the motto and off we went, but before we got out of Gros- Morne I had to switch motto drivers. Ottobear was not traveling up with me. My next driver was an Agriculture student who does a ton of work in the forest/garden in Grand Planne. So we hoped back on the motto and off we went. It was a pretty uncomfortable ride because I had a huge backpack on my back and I was hanging on for dear life because I thought I was going to fly off at any minute. To get to Grann Plenn we had to cross through 4 rivers. The rivers were pretty long and it was nerve racking. Every time we got to a river I said to the student I can walk I don’t need to ride over on the motto and he would turn back and say no just relax. The reason I was freaking out is because mottos are not made to keep the traction on the rocks in the water, so I felt at any minute I was just going to tip right over. After we made it across all the rivers safely I thought for sure I could relax, well that was a big fat joke. After we passed them we came to the long huge hills we had to drive up and I really thought for sure we were going to tip over. We finally had reached a better road and the motto driver just stopped. He turned around and started to ask me if I had food for the week and I told him no I have money to give to the family I am staying with. Now just keep in mind this whole conversation was in creole. He kept looking at me like I was crazy when I told him this. He just kept saying no you need to buy your own food and I just kept answering no I don’t. Finally after about a 15 minute conversation like this we started going again. After about another 15 minutes on the motto we had reached my destination for the week. He drove me up to school and of course about 30 kids ran up to me. The driver looked at me and I could tell he had no idea what was going on. I asked him do you know the family I am staying with and he had no clue. Finally a man came out of the school building and I told him that I was the volunteer from Gros- Morne , and that I was supposed to be staying up here for the week. I had called Brittany at this point because I felt a little uncomfortable, and she told me that they would call Ottobear. After a few seconds the man’s phone went off and it all seemed to click after he got off the phone. The driver told me to get back on the motto and he took me down to a house. The house was beautiful. It was settled in the back of a corner of land and had a yard in the front of it. The man walked me in the house were a young women was standing and she showed me to a room. There was three beds and two windows. They told me this is where I would be staying for the week. I asked the motto driver then who do I give the money too and he asked me how much I had. I told him and he said just hold on. Well at this point again I felt that I should call Brittany because I didn’t want the money to fall in the wrong hands of someone. She asked me if the guy was there that brought me to the house because she wanted to speak to him. She talked to him and then told me to give the money to him so I did. After all of that was figured out I was left to myself. I have to say I felt so alone and awkward. I thought to calm myself down I would take a shower and try to relax, but that didn’t even help much. I rushed in the shower because at any point I thought someone would swing the door open or put their head in the window. After I showered I went an curdled up on the bed and just laid there. The time felt like it was moving so slow. Finally, later on around 6ish the little girl had brought dinner into me. I was so hungry at this point but when I saw the food my appetite disappeared. It was a soup that looked like straight milk. It was very sweet and just honestly wasn’t too appetizing. After I had finished I decided to just go to bed, but it was only 9 o’clock. I just laid their and starred up at the ceiling and killed the bugs that were flying around the light of my iPod. I honestly thought to myself “WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING HERE!” I felt so alone and miserable. I felt as if I really wasn’t welcomed there, but I knew I had to just push through it because at the end of the day it was going to make me a stronger person.

            That night I virtually cried myself to sleep because of the all emotions running through my body, but I survived. I woke up around 6:30 am because I just wanted to get up and out of the house. I left without eating and headed to the school. Once I got to the school all the children ran up to me , and this made me feel at home. The kids came up to me and started holding my hands and talking with me. I asked one of the teachers who taught third grade if I could sit in on his house class to listen to the creole. He of course had no problem with it. The school day went by pretty fast and at some points was a little awkward. After school had finished the older gentleman took me up the garden and showed me what the kids would be working on during the school year. I have to say the forest/garden was amazing! It was so huge and the students were the ones who were producing it. It was a great experience to see and to learn how they run this program at their school compared to our school in Gros-Morne. I then returned back to the house and had way too much time on my hands. I laid around and started to read a book called Travesty in Haiti. This book was so intriguing and it really kept my mind occupied. Later on in the evening the young women in the house came in to my room and begin to talk with me, which was comforting. Her name was Rosenade and she was 21 years old. She stayed with me and just practiced creole with me virtually all night. She also was the one who cooked me dinner, so in a way you could she was in charge of me for the week. She honestly was such a sweet heart and if it wasn’t for her I would have been alone all week. After she left my room later that night I broke down. I just started crying and I really couldn’t stop. I really missed my family, friends and boyfriend. I especially missed my boyfriend because right now our communication is so limited, and it became more limited while being on my immersion. I have to say the one thing that got me through this night was the playlist he put together for me. He put together a list of 30 songs that reminded him of us and our love. It is one of the sweetest things I have ever had someone do for me and it truly put me to sleep this night.
This is Rosenade. I am so blessed to have meant her.
 

            The next morning again I woke up at 6:30 and got around. This time I decided to eat before school because I felt pretty weak form not eating a lot the past two days. When I was finished I headed out and at school today I decided to sit in with another teacher. His name is Robenson and he is the preschool teacher. The little ones were so excited I was there and honestly they are the cutest little children ever. In his class we got to do some painting which was so fun. We gave each child a piece of paper and gave them three colors of paint and we then taught them to fold the paper over. We then pressed all the colors together to make a colorful picture. The kids loved it! After art we did counting. I sat at one table and Robenson sat at the other one. We had little blocks and we taught the kids how to count 1-10. Some of the children picked it up and some struggled, but it was amazing to see them learning. After the counting we let the kids start to write their letters, but Robenson left right after the kids had started. So I was teaching the class all of sudden. This frustrated me a lot because this is one thing I had noticed about the past two days. The teachers would start a lesson and then just leave the room and go off somewhere. I mean how are the kids supposed to learn when the teacher just walks off? I did the best I could to keep the kids going, but it really was a struggle. Thirty minutes had passed and he finally returned. At this point it was time for the kids to have recess. During recess I would sit in the classroom with a few kids who didn’t want to go out in the heat and play. Some of the teachers would sit with me and this is where you could say some things got a little interesting. The school I was working out was all male teachers not one female, so I ran into a few issues. The issues weren’t horrible but they could make you feel a tad uncomfortable. Just to give you a little sample of what the teachers would say to me every day “Beth you are beautiful” or “You have a beautiful figure”, it was very overwhelming. I knew they didn’t mean any harm by it, but it got to be a lot when it was every day. Just to explain this a little further so you don’t get the wrong picture. Many Haitians think Americans are beautiful. They love our eyes, our hair, our skin, our smiles, and just virtually everything about our appearance. It’s hard to understand, but when they would say this to me I would try to explain to them that they are beautiful too. They tend not to believe it though, which is sad because they are truly beautiful on the inside and out. Now to get back to the day after recess the day was finished. School ended every day at noon. When school ended I would head back to the house and just settle in for the rest of the day.

These are the little ones working on the art projects!
 
 
I have to say I loved doing art with them! It made me fee like a kid again.
 
This little sweetheart walked with me everyday.
 
 
By Wednesday I felt more comfortable at the house and I was really focused on finishing my book. I went to give you all a little more insight in to what Travesty in Haiti is all about. I started reading this book because I wanted to learn more about the culture of Haiti and let me tell you this book gives you an amazing insight in to different aspects of Haiti. The book is self-published by a man who spent part of his life living in Haiti working for different organizations. He mainly collected data on American and German organizations that were supposed to be helping the Haitians. The results he got from surveying the Haitians was unbelievable. The food organizations from the Americans and Germans were not helping the Haitians at all. They were actually harming them in multiple ways. I honestly couldn’t believe it and it made me think to myself am I truly going to be able to help at all? Or am I going to harm them to? These are valid questions that I think to myself here and there, but I know that I am not going to make some huge big difference in their world. I do know though that if I can get a child to smile or laugh that my day is complete and for that one second I made them have a little bit of fun. This book is truly an eye opener and makes you realize how corrupt organizations are. I challenge all of you to pick up and give it read! I would love to hear what you think about it because for me it really gave me an outlook into how are aid has not been making a difference.

As I said if I can make a child smile my day is complete.
 
That night my stomach was a little upset, but I did get a good night’s sleep. The next morning I didn’t know how much I was going to do because I felt horrible. I got up though and decided to head to the school. It was a pretty fun day because we combined all three preschool classes. We combined the classes because we were missing a bunch of students yet. In the class today we taught them a song that everyone knows. It was head, shoulders, knees and toes. It was so cute! The kids absolutely loved it and I got to teach it in English. The day ended pretty early because they had parent meeting, so I headed back to the house and rested for the rest of the day. I really didn’t feel good at all and I didn’t know if I should wait till Friday to come home or leave tonight. I waited the night out though and I’m happy I did, because that night only got more interesting. The man who had brought me to the house on the first day would come and visit me. Now to be honest I didn’t really appreciate him to much because I felt as if he thought I was dumb. He came in my room and just sat down on the chair and interrupted Roes and I’s conversation, which I didn’t appreciate. He kept stopping me and asking me if I understand what he was saying and I kept telling him yes. At one point then I just ignored him and acted as if he really wasn’t there because I just couldn’t deal with it anymore. I am pretty sure he got the picture and he left. Rose stayed and we continued to talk and I found out something that shocked me. She asked me how much money I gave to stay with her and for food. I told her and she said that wasn’t what she had received. I asked her what you mean. Where did the money go? She told me that the man who was sitting with us took it for himself. I had no words and I had no idea what to say because he took around 10 dollars US from her. I just kept apologizing and said I will talk to the sisters about this when I leave. She wasn’t mad at me but I could tell she wanted the money. That night I went to bed with a lot on my mind because I knew it was only going to get more awkward tomorrow with me leaving.

            The next morning I woke up and again I wasn’t feeling great at all, but I decided to go to the school before I headed back to Gros-Morne. When I got to the school no one was there today because it was Friday. Now on Fridays school gets out even earlier. It ends at 11 on Fridays and it ends this early just because it’s Friday. Pretty crazy right? So today we just did a short lesson with them on math and sang one song. Of course they loved singing and dancing. After that we were done for the day and I have to say I was thrilled to be done! All I wanted to do was leave and go back to my home. When I got back to the house though it wasn’t great. Rose had family over and I could tell they were talking about me. Earlier that day I had bought her a toro because it’s her favorite drink, so of course her family saw this. They started to say to her if she can buy you a toro for 75 goudes she can give you the extra money. I finally interjected and told them I understand what you’re saying and I will talk to the sisters about this when I get home. I apologized for the man taking the money and I reassured them that Rose would get the money. They still weren’t thrilled with me and I thought they were going to run me out of the house, but I was saved because my motto driver had arrived. I literally grabbed my bag and hoped on the motto. I waved goodbye and off I went. I was beyond thrilled to be going back home. It took me over an hour to get home, but I didn’t even mind the hills or rivers because I knew I was coming home…
Headed back to Gros- Morne.
 

Well I hope you enjoy the read! I will be posting my second week in two days so you can see the other struggles I had to overcome. This first week by no means was easy for me it tested my emotional side, my compassionate side, my thoughts and so much more.

May God bless you all and if any of you ever have any questions about Haiti or would like to know further information about my experiences in Haiti just leave a comment! I will get back to you as soon as I can!

Be on the lookout for my immersion part two!
 

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